Three Steps To Take If Your Employer Says You Lack Confidence

Here are three practical steps you can take if your employer, manager, team leader or supervisor tells you you lack confidence.

With more than a decade of experience as a qualified life, career and executive coach coupled with my role as Confidence Coach on the expert panel for Image Business Club, I have dedicated my career to empowering women to build their confidence. Let me share with you how you can achieve the same when someone you work with says that you lack confidence but doesn’t offer any meaningful solutions!

1. Ask For Feedback
   Don't be afraid to ask for very specific feedback from your employer regarding scenarios when they feel your lack of confidence presents an issue. Constructive criticism is a powerful tool for improvement. Use feedback as a learning opportunity, and approach it with a growth mindset.
   

2. Work With a Coach
   Working with an executive coach who specializes in confidence-building can provide personalized guidance, helping you unlock your full potential and navigate challenges with newfound assurance. If there's a particular coach you're interested in (Hi!), share some details about them. Maybe you've heard about their success stories, or their expertise aligns with your needs. This could be a key step in addressing your confidence concerns.

   Now, when it comes to outlining your objectives and expected outcomes from working with this coach, think about the tangible ways it will impact your contributions to the team. Are you aiming to improve your leadership skills, enhance your communication abilities, or boost your decision-making confidence? Be specific about the areas you want to develop.

   For instance, if you're working on leadership skills, you might set objectives like improving team collaboration and communication or making more informed decisions. Clearly defining these goals will not only guide your coaching sessions but also help measure your progress.

   Ultimately, the idea is to showcase how investing in this coaching opportunity will translate into tangible benefits for both you and the team. It's about turning newfound confidence into positive actions and contributions within the workplace.
   

3. Practice Self-Compassion
   It's totally normal to feel unsure and to lack confidence – everyone goes through it. I get that it's tough at the moment, but trust me, things will improve. I promise.
   

So, maybe you’re reading this because your boss or supervisor just told you that you lack confidence but didn’t really follow up with any meaningful solution. You’re probably thinking, now what? Well, my Career Confidence and Clarity Coaching programme is a 12-week private coaching programme designed to help you ditch the doubt and escape the grip of that nagging voice inside so you can become a fearless, empowered and confident professional. My compassionate-led approach to building confidence focuses on just that: BUILDING confidence. Together, we will create a roadmap that will support you in increasing your confidence at work. Get in touch today to find out more.

As much as I believe it is crucial to emphasize the need to support women on their confidence-building journey by offering concrete support through coaching or mentoring, it’s important to address the elephant in the room. In the absence of these actionable steps, is confidence used as a weapon against women?*

When women are labelled as lacking confidence, it frequently leaves us feeling exposed and vulnerable. This can hinder our professional growth and contribute to feelings of hopelessness and frustration in the workplace.

According to Darren T. Baker and Juliet Bourke in their provocative piece titled “How Confidence Is Weaponized Against Women”, when women fail to achieve their career goals, employers are often too quick to blame a lack of confidence. They go on to suggest that when a woman's lack of career progression is blamed on them, they will beat themselves, resulting in lower levels of self-esteem than when they started.

Despite the increasing recognition of confidence as a valuable skill, the focus can not simply be on confidence but rather on adopting a compassionate-led approach to confidence building.

Addressing and actively supporting women in building confidence is not just a matter of personal and professional development; it is a strategic imperative for creating an inclusive and thriving workplace where every individual can reach their full potential. Disregarding the influence of a woman's (or any underrepresented group's) social, cultural, economic, and civic circumstances on their ability to confidently progress in their careers dismisses our reality and diminishes our unique lived experiences, which are unequal and inequitable compared to others.

It's time for a change, a real one that supports and empowers our team members to grow in all aspects of their roles.